.You Know You Are an Indonesian If{?}

# Your stomach growls when you don't eat rice for a day.
# You believe kecap ABC could turn bad cooking to gourmet food.
# You think our country is a democracy.
# You talk during a movie.
# You use a bucket instead of toilet paper in the bathroom.
# You eat fried rice in the morning.
# You prefer Versace or Moschino jeans over Gap or Levi's.
# You don't think Jim Carrey is funny.
# You think Onky Alexander is a hunk.
# You think Rhoma Irama is kampungan.
# You carry a 16 oz. jar of sambal to where ever you travel.
# Driving a car that is cheaper than $15,000 embarrasses you.
# You think dangdut is stupid, but listen to it anyways, because you are homesick.
# You are willing to travel 25 miles to buy tahu and tempe.
# You are "Dreaming of a WARM Christmas".
# You are very good at avoiding potholes and other road hazards.
# Your local McDonald's serves rice and sambal.
# You think Supermi is a staple food.
# You have ever tried passing a Rp 50 coin as a quarter in a US vending machine/pay phone.
# You have ever successfully bribed a police officer.
# You have ever successfully bribed a customs officer.
# You have smuggled electronics and porn into Indonesia.
# You do your shopping in Singapore.
# Your drivers license claims you are 5 years older then you really are.
# You have ever legally bought pirated software.
# You have ever been forced to memorize UUD'45.
# You have bought something from a barefooted street peddler.
# You know exactly how many islands Indonesia has.
# You have ever eaten something sold off a cart on wheels.
# You realized that money is everything before you were six.
# The first thing that comes to mind when hearing the word "Jakarta" is "macet".
# Someone you know has ever ridden on top of a train.
# Your daily commute includes thinking up new ways to ride the city bus for free.
# You don't mind people being late.
# You think standing in line is a waste of time.
# You have tried every Monday of your youth trying to avoid upacara bendera.
# You have used a mosquito repellant that looks like a coil and is lit on one end.
# You use the terms "Ni yee", "-lah" and "Ih, jijay" on daily basis
# You know what Pancasila is, what it means and know it by heart.
# You complain that movies in America don't have sub-titles.
# Your daily conversation may include enactments of TV commercials.
# You have ever consulted a dukun.
# Your whole class has ever cheated on a test, and gotten away with it.
# You have ever spent the night before an exam looking for someone who sells the questions.
# You like the smell of terasi.
# You think the Thomas Cup is equal to the Super Bowl.
# You can name a manufacturer of shuttlecocks/badminton birdies.
# You have a 16' satellite dish hidden in your back yard.
# You have ever ridden in a motor vehicle with three wheels.
# You miss your maid during laundry day.
# Your clothing has brand names printed on it that is visible from 50' away.
# You attend weddings only until you are done eating.
# You have attended weddings that you are not invited to.
# You go to McDonald's to get your weekly supply of ketchup, salt, pepper and napkins.
# You know more than one music group that stole the tune of Cranberries' "Zombie".
# You have a can of Baygon on your kitchen table.
# You make major decisions based on gengsi.
# You take advantage of Wal-Mart's 30 days money-back-guarantee to "borrow" home appliances.
# Someone in your family has extra pockets in his outfit to hide cookies from the all-you-can-eat bar.
# You have paid more then $1000 to get your name on your license plate.
# When watching TV you regularly find that all the channels broadcast the same thing.